"As viscous as motor oil swirled in a swamp, redolent of burnt bell peppers nested in by incontinent mice and a finish reminiscent of the dregs of a stale can of Coca-Cola that someone has been using as an ashtray. Not a bad drink, though."--Excerpt from "The Moose Turd Wine Tasting" by T. A. Nonymous
2 pounds navy beans 1 large white onion 5 quarts water 1 3/4 pounds ham hocks 1 1/4 teaspoons white pepper
Wash beans until white. Finely chop onion and add to beans. Bring water to a boil and add ham hocks and beans. Simmer for 3-plus hours in covered pot, adding water if needed. Add white pepper and salt to taste.
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