"The tradition of Italian cooking is that of the matriarch. This is the cooking of grandma. She didn't waste time thinking too much about the celery. She got the best celery she could and then she dealt with it."--Mario Batali
1 med. elephant Brown Gravy (lots of it) 2 rabbits(opt.)
Cut elephant into bite-size pieces (this will take about 2 months). Add enough brown gravy to cover. Cook in a great big pot over kerosene fire for about 4 weeks at 465º. This will serve about 1, 973 people. If more are expected, the rabbits may be added. but do this only if necessary as most people do not like to find hare in their stew.
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