"As viscous as motor oil swirled in a swamp, redolent of burnt bell peppers nested in by incontinent mice and a finish reminiscent of the dregs of a stale can of Coca-Cola that someone has been using as an ashtray. Not a bad drink, though."--Excerpt from "The Moose Turd Wine Tasting" by T. A. Nonymous
Select crab apples. Wash and remove blossom ends. Cut into quarters without peeling. Barely cover with water. Boil until apples is tender. Strain through a jelly bag. Measure and bring juice to a boiling point. Add 3/4 cup of sugar for each cup of juice. Boil rapidly to jelly stage. Pour into jars and seal.
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