"As viscous as motor oil swirled in a swamp, redolent of burnt bell peppers nested in by incontinent mice and a finish reminiscent of the dregs of a stale can of Coca-Cola that someone has been using as an ashtray. Not a bad drink, though."--Excerpt from "The Moose Turd Wine Tasting" by T. A. Nonymous
2 lbs. Velveeta cheese 1 lb. Longhorn cheese 3 ( 8 oz.) pkg. cream cheese, softened 4 oz. almonds 1/2 tsp. onion salt 1/2 tsp. garlic salt
Put Velveeta and Longhorn cheeses through grinder; alternating with the almonds. Blend onion salt and garlic salt with softened cream cheese. Mix all ingredients together. Form into balls and roll in nuts or paprika. Refrigerate. Serve with crackers.
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