"As viscous as motor oil swirled in a swamp, redolent of burnt bell peppers nested in by incontinent mice and a finish reminiscent of the dregs of a stale can of Coca-Cola that someone has been using as an ashtray. Not a bad drink, though."--Excerpt from "The Moose Turd Wine Tasting" by T. A. Nonymous
Describe your mother in her best dress and your father in his working clothes.
My mother was very self-conscious. She made most of her dresses with long sleeves or three quarter length. She played the organ at church. She never wore short sleeves in public. My daddy worked in the coal mines for a while. When they moved back to Tennessee he began to do carpenter work and built houses.
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